A few years ago whilst on a night out with my best mate, I bumped into a really hot, gorgeous man, who paid me a lot of attention, flattered me endlessly, stimulated me with fantastic conversation and said he was dying to meet me again. We swapped numbers and the next day (being quite keen) he called me and asked me for a date.

I got all ready and got the bus into the city to meet this drop dead gorgeous stud, butterflies having a seizure in my stomach, and generally psyched up with all the anticipation of a red hot date. I got off the bus and sat there waiting for my knight in shining armour. 2 minutes later a man walks over and says “Hello” and introduces himself as my hot date. Except – not so hot. Now what I failed to mention is when I met this guy of my dreams, I was a bit worse for wear after sinking one too many vodkas. Instantly all my hopes were dashed and I was in too much of a state of shock to deny all knowledge, pretend I was someone else and do a runner.

So off we went to a bar and got a drink, and this is where the truth came out that he wasn’t my age like I had presumed on the first meeting, but 10 years older, with an attitude of ‘Been there, done that’. He was so not my type, and I could not take my attention away from his AWFUL wet, dribbly, public schoolboy looking mouth. I realised with horror that he probably thought I wanted to kiss him as I kept staring at it. The conversation was so stinted, we had absolutely NOTHING in common whatsoever, and it got to the point where I just could no longer be bothered to even fake an interest, so those very long periods of silence between us grew and grew. The tension could have been sliced with a knife and I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.

We left the bar and went for a walk to the park, and I think we didn’t speak for about 15 minutes straight at one point. I could no longer bare the situation, and the sight of him physically repulsed me, so I flicked my hair back and casually asked what his plans for that evening were. He replied he had kept the whole evening free to spend with me, then he asked if I fancied going back to his place. Talk about a desperate situation!! I answered that I had already arranged to meet a friend for dinner that night and I should probably head back (after all, I had spent a tortuous 2 hours with him already). He said “Oh”. Like what did he expect? Honestly.

He walked me back to the bus which was in collaboration with the law of sod and was late, so we stood there in silence, me looking around, trying desperately not to catch his eye, then when the bus got there and I said goodbye, he leaned over towards my face, which made me jump and sprint onto the bus shouting “Bye”. My heart pounding I collapsed on a seat exhausted from the stress. Needless to say I never heard from him again.

Tip for you women out there: NEVER EVER go on a date with someone you met whilst you were drunk. It will be the worst couple of hours of your life, and the supposedly Prince Charming truly is a frog. (No offence to frogs as their much cuter, and I would rather kiss a frog any day).

I need some input from all of you on this one, I was talking to my friend the other evening and she asked me to visit this site on vaser lipo. I suspect she is actually considering getting this done. How do I go about approaching the subject of saying that she shouldn’t be compelled to do this and she should try a natural alternative of shedding weight first…